90th Birthday

HAPPY 90TH BIRTHDAY MUM.

It was mums' 90th birthday a couple of weeks ago. I'm a bit late posting this, but better late than never. Although when you're 90 things shouldn't be left for too long should they. It was the first time in about 30 years that we have all been together, seeing as how everyone is scattered all over the country. It was great to all catch up and spend some time together. The birthday lunch was delicious "homemade" pumkin soup and little quiches and party pies and sausage rolls and delicious birthday cake.

Here we all are in our matronly glory! the H-W girls, all six of us plus mum. Seven women in a 3 bedroom house with one bathroom co-existing. Not the most harmonious at times. Especially Saturday nights when we were all trying to get ready to go out (1 bathroom, remember). But we've all turned out OK and poor mum has survived all that cooking, washing, cleaning and sewing she did for us. Thanks mum.

Here's the lowdown on us, oldest to youngest: (tongue firmly in cheek)

B. She bellowed and was bossy and we were all a little afraid of her. But now she's a GRANDMA to a sweet little boy, she's just a big mushy pushover and we can all boss her now.

J. Slightly bohemian, swanning around town in her red wool cape and black boots.

A. She was the door slammer of the family, now she just slams down vodka shots.....hey who said that...that's not true....she's very conservative and is Our Lady of the Books.

D. that's me........we'll get back to me in a moment.

M. Always had two big lumps on here forehead from falling over all the time. But she has produced a beautiful gifted child, so there is something to be said for numerous blows to the head at a young age.

N. She was the plumpest, yummiest baby and I used to kiss her from the morning till the night which probably explains why she moved to the other side of the country and is slightly disturbed. (not really)

Then there's me. Well........I was the sweetest, most polite, helpful and obliging child and everyone loved me. OK?

(all nasty comments from the sisters will be vetted....you all know who you are)

Having a Whinge

I was watching Grumpy Old Women the other night on the ABC and it wasn't a terribly funny episode so that made me a little annoyed. After hours and hours of Olympics (any one who knows me knows I'm not a fan of sports, especially hours of uninterupted sport on TV) I was looking forward to some light relief, a belly laugh or three, something that I could relate to, something I could agree with and say, yes, yes, I know exactly what you mean. But alas, it was all pretty standard stuff........so I decided to make my own list of things that annoy me, that make me grumpy, that make want to run screaming down the street and yelling why, why, WHY.

So here's my list:



1. Checkout chics who don't know what an avacado is..........seriously.



2. Photoshop....why hasn't someone written a "how to" book that explains things, step by labourious step, for us Baby Boomers who haven't a clue about anything to do with computers, (at least we know what an avacado is!). Even my copy of Photoshop for Seniors is of no use whatsoever.



3. Petrol stations.....remember back in the good old days when you got service. They filled your tank, checked your oil, washed the windscreen, took your money and brought back the change all with you not having to exit your vehicle. Now we pay them for the priviledge of doing all those tasks and get charged extra when we use a credit card!



4. Crock pots......The new crock pots don't cook like the old ones did. The temperature is too high and everything dries out and it's tough. Evidently it's to do with food safety standards, someone could become ill from food that wasn't cooked properly. Well I'd like to know how many "crock pot" deaths have been recorded since their invention. None I suspect.



5. Husbands who think that sport is the only good thing on TV. I mean what's wrong with Home and Away, Desperate Housewives, Brothers and Sisters, Better Homes and Gardens and best of all Dancing with the Stars. I mean really, the man has no taste when it comes to TV viewing.



6. This is the one that makes me the grumpiest of all. Loud music in shops. Can't stand it, it drives me absolutely insane. Every shop you enter has loud music which is competing with the piped music from the shopping centre. I don't understand it. I would think that shop owners would want to provide a pleasurable experience for their customers, to keep them browsing longer in the hopes the customer will eventually spend some money. Not me....if the music is too loud I walk straight out. I have even asked in some shops for the music to be turned down! Then the young assistants look at me like I'm a Grumpy Old Women ......the cheek of it all.


..........when I'm grumpy ............. ..........I look like this.

.........and when I'm really grumpy..............

..........I morph into this!

A Mortifying Moment

I've only had my printer for about three months and a couple of weeks ago it went berserk with lots of clanging and screeching. It kept telling me that I had a paper jam. Well I turned that printer upside down and inside out looking for jammed paper and couldn't find any. so I rang the the printer company and was told to bring it in. On a very wet, windy, stormy day I drove to the other side of town dodging debris that had blown over the road and stupid windscreen wipers that only work properly if you are doing 100k's down the freeway and of course hoping all the way that when I got there I would find a park right out the front. But no..........so in between showers I tried to run down the road carrying that stupid bulky printer without dropping it and dodging the rain. Running, bulky and rain shouldn't be in the same sentence. So I finally get in there and tell the guy the problem and there is definitely no jammed paper in there because I have looked and I'm not very happy that after only 3 months the printer is broken. (There was no mistaking the cutting tone in my voice........see above ATC). Well two weeks went by and I finally got a call saying it was ready and there certainly was paper jammed in the printer. I went to pick it up and the service guy and very kindly folded up and taped to the top of it the piece of paper that had been caught. When I got home and connected it all again I was curious to see what was on the jammed piece of paper. Imagine my horror, embarresment and mortification when I saw what it was.............


Now I have to explain..........Chas brings home lots of scrap paper from work which I use when I'm doing a test print run. I never look to see what's on the other side, just bung it in the printer and away I go, but from now on I think I'll do a little checking before I hit the print button just in case. What must the printer service guy be thinking!